Seven Tips to Becoming a Social Media Messenger Guru

If you’ve ever studied communication and body language, you’ve heard that the words we “say” are only 10% of our entire communication.  The other 90% comes from our vocal tones and body language.

Today we are doing a lot of our business on Facebook Messenger and via texting.  This leaves us with only the words people say and 10% of our potential clients’ true meaning. How do we get more of their true meaning?

Always end with a question

When we are listening to someone talk, and someone is finishing a thought or a sentence, the tone of their voice changes when they are turning the floor over to the person they are communicating with.  When we text message and their voice isn’t a part of the communication, the period at the end of the sentence doesn’t tell you if they are done talking, or if they are just ready to start the next sentence.

When we can’t hear their voice, we don’t always know it’s our turn to talk, or understand that we are being prompted to speak.  The best fix for this is to ask a question at the end of all your messages so the person knows you’re saying, “It’s your turn to talk.”  It also shows you are interested in them vs wanting to do all the talking yourself.

Make your questions conversational

In regards to the questions that you ask, it’s important that they elicit more than a “yes” or “no” response.  Prompt them instead to express full sentences and ideas.

Sentence starters to avoid:

  • Do you do this …. ?
  • Do you want to …. ?
  • Do you like this ….?
  • Would you be willing to ….?
  • Is this __________ important?

Sentence starters that are effective:

  • How often do you do ….?
  • On a scale of 1-10, how much do you want ….?
  • How intense is your desire to have ….?
  • What are your thoughts on doing _________?
  • What are your feeling regarding _________?
  • What are your plans for ….?

Using the second set of sentence starters will give you a much more open conversation that will help you to have a clearer understanding of what your client’s interests, concerns and motivations are.

Use words that leave NO DOUBT

When you reply, use words that are clear and precise. When you are in agreement with something someone sells, are excited for them, or are willing to be of assistance, use words like the following.

Words that are unclear and could have multiple meanings:

  1. Sure
  2. Yeah
  3. Okay
  4. I guess so
  5. I can do that
  6. Good

Words of agreement and willingness

  1. Absolutely!
  2. I’d be thrilled to.
  3. It would be my pleasure!
  4. That’s a fabulous _______.
  5. I love that idea.
  6. I completely understand!
  7. Amazing
  8. Fantastic
  9. That’s brilliant

Use these words, and you’ll make people lean on you, trust you, like you more, and trust you as you make product suggestions.

Ask for clarifications

Sometimes we’ll have someone tell us what action they are taking, tell us how they feel about something, or even get quiet.  We can wonder what the real meaning of their words, or lack of words, means.

Use the phases:

  • May I clarify, is this what you mean/feel… ?
  • May I ask, is this how you are feeling? You are excited, but concerned about the cost?
  • What you are saying is, the opportunity sounds amazing, but you are worried about how much time it will take?

Use audio messenger

When using Facebook messenger, using the audio recorder is a fantastic way of letting your clients know how happy, enthusiastic and grateful you are. They can’t see your body language, but they can at least hear your tone of voice.  It’s a wonderful method to make sure they know how you feel.

Sometimes that will encourage your clients to do the same.  When you can hear their voice, it helps you to better understand their feelings, and have a better sense of what is important to them.

Insert emoji’s

Emoji symbols are a fantastic way of showing a little bit of your personality.  It’s is also a nice added touch that shows you spent a little extra time to make sure your message is clear.

If someone is having a difficult time deciding what they most want, it can also lighten the mood and any feelings of being pressured.

Use them to show:

  • Empathy when someone is sad or disappointed
  • Your excitement and to give someone a virtual high five
  • That you noticed their hard work and want to give someone a compliment
  • Love and compassion
  • Understanding that you know they need a good laugh
  • Gratitude

Replace questions that could be answered “NO”

Many people, especially women, hate to tell someone no.  If you ask a question like the following, sometimes people will just stop responding instead of saying no.

  • Do you want to order…?
  • Do you want to book a party?
  • Do you want to try the business opportunity?
  • Do you have a friend to invite?

Sometimes they silently say “no” with a lack of a response because they have a belief that would keep them from taking a risk.  Product is expensive, it’s a lot of work to be the hostess, I don’t want to bug my friend(s), ect.

But those things aren’t usually true, and you can’t clear up any misunderstandings if they don’t tell you what they are thinking and the conversation comes to a complete halt.

Try these phrases instead:

  • Which of the products that you’ve heard about are you the most excited about trying?
  • What are your thoughts on hosting a party?
  • On a scale of 1-10, how interested are you in information about the business opportunity with my company?
  • Who do you know that loves to do the things you are doing?

These tips apply to several types of conversations you have when growing a business.

  1. Potential clients – By using these tips you will close more first time sales.
  2. Following up with current clients – Repeat sales will sky rocket.
  3. Hostesses – Coach better and have higher party sales.
  4. Potential team members – Listen better and understand how the business would change their lives.
  5. Current team members – Keep close relationships and empower them to work smart.
  6. Rock stars on your team – Celebrate and give your top 20% the recognition they deserve.

Become a social media communications guru and watch your business soar to new heights!


Michelle Withers

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