I said, “Don’t think about a pink elephant. What ever you do, don’t think about that pink elephant.”
What are you thinking about? I’m sure its NOT a pink elephant because that’s what I told you NOT to do. right? LOL
If you are like most people I’m guess you are struggling to think about anything else. It’s incredibly difficult to think about anything different than the words you hear and the pictures seen even if you are told NOT to.
I bet you’ve seen this same kind of thing happen everyday. It might be a situation at work when you tell someone DON’T forget to do _______. At home with a child or spouse, DON’T drop that. Maybe even yourself, DON’T be late. Yet how often does it then get FORGOTTEN, DROPPED and you arrive LATE.
There is this funny little basic rule in life; you get what you focus on.
I’ve sold something almost my entire life. When you choose that career, you have two things you can focus on; the customers who buy or the customers who don’t buy. It is easy to find yourself worrying about all the people who may not buy. When I learned that I get more of what I focus on, all of the sudden I found it easier to find more customers. Not only that, I literally had more energy, more peace and an added perk always is more money. Yes, I said it, spend less energy, feel more peaceful simply by focusing on the buying customers and actually many more money. Feel free to doubt me, give it a try and see what happens.
How can this principle be applied in your personal life. When I first learned to drive I had the most difficult time avoiding potholes. I remember staring down a pothole I was was approaching and think, “Don’t hit the pothole, don’t hit the pothole.” Without fail I hit it every time. It was incredibly frustration and quite frankly I was rather embarrassed. One day I changed what I was saying to myself, “Stay on the smooth part of the road.” I’ve never hit a pothole again.
How often are you telling yourself things like; “Don’t be late” “Don’t eat sugar.” The list is long of things we tell ourselves NOT to do, but how well is it working. I challenge you to change your wording to stating what you want to happen versus what you are worried will happen.
If you are a parent or grandparent, have you ever seen this situation. You tell a child, “Don’t touch that,” and it almost instantly happens. The same rule applies, focus on what you want the child to do. One of my children when through a period of trying to stay out of trouble by lying. In an effort to try to adjust her behavior I gave her the assignment to write 25 times, “I will always be honest with my mother.”